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Mars and Pfizer Issue Joint Recall of Viagra®
and Blue M&Ms
August 15, 2006
McLEAN, Va. - In an unprecedented joint-recall
announcement Mars and Pfizer Incorporated have requested that consumers
return to the place of purchase all blue M&Ms and Viagra®
tablets bought between December 25, 2005, and February 14, 2006.
The recall is a result of a steady stream of consumer reports that
both products were working much differently than advertised.
"Best New Year's Day I ever had," said
Emilene Snutter of East Chester, Pennsylvania. "Earl actually
put down his remote at the end of the fourth quarter of the Rose
Bowl with Texas making a drive for the lead.
"At the time I thought it was the jalapeño
dip, but during NFL playoffs it became clearer. After my sister-in-law,
Earlene, came over for bridge one Saturday, I figured it out for
sure. She won't touch a blue M&M. Very traditional, you know.
Anyway, Earl was ruttin' like a rhino on Sunday morning. We barely
made it for the sermon."
Viagra user Robert McCann said, "I didn't
get anywhere with Hilda, but I didn't care, the tablet just melted
in my mouth not in my hand. You woulda thought it was Belgian chocolate
not sildenafil citrate."
Neither media savvy Mars nor Pfizer could provide
an explanation for the embarrassing snafu.
"We do not understand how this could have
happened," admitted newly appointed Pfizer chief executive
officer Jeffrey B. Kindler. "While we share the same blue-dye
manufacturer and the same trans-shipper, we do not understand at
all how our products could have become interchanged."
"We are understandably very concerned, as
both companies may lose millions in potential revenue," said
the head of public relations for Mars Inc., Jonn E. Hamlin. "And
for this to happen just as consumers were beginning to accept blue
M&Ms as unobjectionable is very poor timing," he added.
"Blue M&Ms, as many of you know, are manufactured
at a separate location from the traditionally colored M&Ms and
at some distance from the packaging facility," said Hamlin.
"But that doesn't explain how they got switched inside the
bags and blister packs."
Pfizer Incorporated, which is headquartered in
New York, said that its Kalamazoo, Michigan, based research and
development division is warning M&M consumers about priapism,
a painful condition that can last for more than four hours, and
has been reported among some Tollhouse cookie consumers. To avoid
long-term injury, it is important that the cookies be allowed to
cool at least fifteen minutes before eating.
In other news, an analyst in Schwab's research
unit reports that both Mars and Pfizer expect much larger profits
in the fourth quarter due to a special edition SNICKERS bar containing
nuggets of the anti-depressant Zoloft®.
For more information, go to: http://www.pugbus.net/artman/publish/08152006_11_recall.shtml
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